Bhangra Rules!

Blistering Barnacles!

Its funny how randomly Captain Haddock came to mind after I inflicted more pain on myself this Saturday. When temperatures soared to 105 degrees around 3pm on the 17th, a few of us insane dancers rocked the amphitheater at the Rancho Cordova International Festival. The result: blistered feet, dehydration and some terrible photographs of us dancers squinting and trying real hard to cover the pain. The concrete we danced on was close to boiling point, I'm sure, and I think I can now say I know what walking on hot coal feels like. At the end of it what came out was however, true team spirit and professionalism and an awe struck audience. The pain quickly dissolved when everyone came up to congratulate us for a fabulous performance and many said it was the best Indian Fusion they had ever witnessed. Go TDC!

And yes, I'm able to walk again! :)

Mamma Day and much More

Despite suggestions from one of my fellow blogger to (a) piss off another blogger or (b) add some sexual content in order to have someone/anyone read my blog, which none of you have been doing lately, I decided to stick with my own jabberings. And in order to boost my self esteem, I did something really wild this mothers day - I got my nose pierced! Since this was such a spur of the moment thing and having not done too much research on the subject matter, I learned a few things that I need to share.

1. You really need to have a pretty nose in order to make that a focal point on your face by adding a little shiny thing.

2. Having a parrot nose does not enhance your look in any way. In fact, sometime due to the funny shape of your nose, the piercing might not be visible at all depending which angle you are looking at the face.

3. Picking your nose/tickling your brain does not seem to be an option.

4. Planning the piercing so that you get it done close to home seems to be a better option than having to drive far away if anything were to go wrong and you needed to go back to get it fixed. This also is relevant to timing it in such a way so that in case your nose was to swell up, you do not have a social commitment, or even better, a performance, a week after the piercing.

5. Sneezing hurts.

6. Inflicting pain to oneself on occasion of mothers day might not seem to be a great idea after all.

7. You might be blackmailed by your spouse that if you don't listen to him, he will punch your nose.

That being said, here is the new me ~



After the night of piercing, Mothers Day was spent at Napa Valley. Okay, this had nothing to do with getting drunk to ease off the pain. I had a friend visiting and we took her for a tour. The weather was gorgeous and the wine made me feel better in a lot of ways, especially since the pricey lunch left me only half full. All in all, I realized how lucky I am to have such a beautiful daughter and being her 'mamma' is the best thing to have happened to me.

As usual Shomeek captures the moment as is ~

A is for Abbles...

B is for Ba(ll) and C is for Cowwwwwww. Evani's vocabulary keeps increasing with lightening speed. In fact I thought I heard her repeat 'airplane' after me today, it was more like 'aibay' though.

Its high time I posted an update on what's going on at my end and here it is:

Let's start with corporate America taking over our lives there for a while. A part of Intel's flash division got spun off into a new company called Numonyx and that very clearly spelled LAYOFFS. We found ourselves doing the whole routine all over again, frantic job searching, stress, lack of sleep. Shomeek left no stones unturned in getting interviews lined up. We got mentally prepared to relocate to wherever Shomeek would find a job and finally he landed one right here itself. He starts at HP on Monday as Product Manager.

On another note, our very close friend and my dance partner at TranceFusion is relocating to Seattle this June as her husband takes up a position at Microsoft (no, you may not call him when your computer starts to stop...;). I'm still not sure how I'm going to deal with her move...but I'm trying to convince myself that everything happens for a reason and that change is the only constant.

Which brings me of course to TranceFusion Dance company and its future. We are growing and performing quite a bit now and although Soma will still be at the heart of its functioning, I'm having this feeling that its not going to be the same. Once again, I'm trying to think positive. TDC is our baby and we are going to give it our all to keep it nourished. BTW, while I'm on this topic I would like to mention that we have been invited to perform at the Rancho Cordova International Festival on May 17th - so all you local readers of my blog are invited to come watch us at the Amphitheater at Capital Village in Zinfandel (right behind the new Chevy's there).

Another major change in my life has been the baby-sitting role that I've taken for a friend's 4 month old daughter. Before you shriek, I had a very valid reason to do it. Since Evani stays at home with me all day, she has become very clingy and used to undivided attention. Since we don't plan to have a second (there, now its in writing!), I figured it would be great to have another kid at home. It has been a week now and has been going great. Evani loves having 'baby' around (yes, she can say 'baby' too) but it still having a hard time getting used to me carrying Wren. I think it will be really good for her...a lot of work for me though! Oh what parents do for their kids - now I know what our parents meant when they said that...;)

Last weekend we went on an impromptu trip to Seattle and guess what - we were lucky enough to see the sun. Surprisingly it was not raining and we had a blast while I fell in love with the city. Here we are being tourists at Space Needle.

The Bong Connection

Nope, I am not daring to write a review on Anjan Dutta's movie titled the same - it is finally the vacation post you have all been so eagerly waiting for - ya right! As I savor the stillness around the house with Evani napping and me not engaged in the vicious cycle of loading and unloading the dishwasher, I finally descend upon my journey to start blogging again. What I enjoy most is however my throat giving me a break from the life wrenching coughing spasms that I've been living with for the past week. My voice still seems to not have found me.

As I lay in bed last night with the eternal feeling of something being stuck to my throat, I craved the sour taste of the tamarind water that goes oh so well with 'puchka' or 'golgappa' or 'panipuri' as all you non-bongs would like to call it. There is however a distinct difference between 'puchka' and 'golgappa'. puchka tastes way better than the non-bong golgappa. There I've said it. Last time I had asked the puchkawallah at the Victoria grounds, while devouring his puchkas like there was no tomorrow, whether the water he used came from the neighboring container from which the ponies were quenching their thirst after having tugged along the very healthy uncles, aunties and their healthier Chotus or Pappus from the Marwari clan of Kolkata sightseers. I had gotten no answers. That did not stop me then and it definitely did not make me the 'Bisleri water in my puchka eating in stainless steel plates at an air-conditioned joint' kind of puchka faker. This time however, I went to my favorite puchka and chaat joint at Vivekananda Park to devour a greater number of puchkas after a 2 year break. Now you see, I am the true puchka connoisseur. I like mine from street vendors, who use their 'who knows where they've been' hands to mash the potatoes and chole. I think THAT is what brings out the flavor. For those who know me, know very well the spice level I can handle - which is like none at all. So, I like a little sweet chutney along with the regular puchka water and my puchka escapades always end with a round of 'churmur'..ummmm....This time my pseudo-umrican hubby was bold enough to join me on this venture. His request for a spicy filling had him visiting the bathroom more often that he would have liked. I on the other hand was really impressed that U.S.A. had still not played havoc with my immune system.

The immune system part did not hold true overall. I had a severe allergy attack which lasted me my entire Kolkata trip. I seemed to have lost control over my itchy and watering eyes and nose and I had to do something that I used to loathe every NRI (Non Resident Indian) for - cover my nose and mouth when out on the streets. Now my friends can finally mock me as being one of 'them.'

Vacationing back home is all about friends and family and being stuffed with food till you're ready to burst or literally throw up, is the typical Bong custom of love and affection. It always amazes me on how much things change between our trips. Sometimes I do not even recognize my nieces or nephews as they've grown so much. Its always a treat catching up with everyones lives. There is one thing in common between all though - they all seem to think we have better lives than them based on our location and vice versa. How I crave to have someone cook, clean and drive me everywhere. My friends crib about how it is so hard on them when their maids have conflicting schedules - the audacity I say!

And it is not only people, but the place in general that has changed so much. Kolkata is no longer the place where I was born and grew up in. I'm sure it is the case with all major Indian cities these days due to the economic boom that's taking place there. But my overall study of Kolkata proved quite disheartening. On taking a closer look I realized the majority of Kolkata's economic growth was coming from call centers and not from real industries. In fact the infrastructure in Kolkata does not encourage big companies to open their offices there. Road conditions are still bad. Even the new ones are crumbling down. Law and order is actually chaos and the pollution has reached new levels. Civic sense is remote. The new upper-end housing developments that are coming up are already stained with 'paan' residue. The talk of development has all Calcuttans pointing towards the glitz of the malls or nightclubs. On visiting a few of both, I wondered what percentage of the real Bengal population could really afford that stuff. The IT sector of Kolakta, Salt Lake, is piling up with call centers which has become recent hubs for sex and drugs. People find it hard to remain healthy with ongoing night shifts and education takes a back seat.

On the brighter side, Kolkata is still the cultural capital of India hosting the pioneers of creative arts. Fine and performing arts have reached a new peak and Kolkata continues on its trend to encourage both traditional and contemporary artists from all over. I was honored to spend some time with Sutapa Talukdar, the famous Odissi dancer and Sudarshan Chakravorty of Sapphire Dance Creations. At the latter meeting, my path also crossed that of one of India's leading fashion photographers, Ranjit Sinha. I'm glad I had taken Shomeek along with me. Both Ranjit and Shomeek spent most of their time talking about cameras while I enjoyed the sun and rhythm watching Sudarshan teach his new dance class geared towards stay-home moms.

This trip was special for many reasons. It was of course our first trip back home with Evani. But it was also kind of a first trip together for both me and Shomeek. During our stay there I hooked Shomeek up with a photographer friend of mine, who is now a photographer for Times of India and Shomeek did something he had always longed for. He went out with his new-found friend, once during the wee hours of morning and the other into the darkness of the night to capture some special heart-felt moments of the city. At the end, one of his morning shots got published in Times of India and and the ecstasy on Shomeek's face made my trip worthwhile.

What moved Evani however was totally different. Windows that looked out into the streets which in turn were filled with people, cars, rickshaws and of course cows. Evani would hold on to the window 'grill' and shout out 'bhow bhow' and/or 'kaak' at the crows dominating the smog filled sky. She loved the taste of fish which in turn filled my Bong heart with joy and bonded very well with our maid Manju.

And I come to the other special part of Cal. Its people, especially the ones that form the core. Not the snooty upper middle class, so called educated and wanna be 'goras' like us. Manju di has been our maid for the longest time. She had started off with being an 'aaya'/nurse taking care of my grandfather when he fell very ill. She stayed on long after he passed away to make sure my dad was taken care of. She takes care of everything for us there - the cooking, cleaning, laundry and almost everything as I mentioned. She was also the best friend my daughter had during her stay there. Manju di left no stones unturned to take care of Evani allowing for me to enjoy my vacation any way I pleased. She not only took care of Evani but made sure all family members needs got met. The best part however is she did all of this out of love more than money. That reason however stems from my dad and how he looks after her family in times of need. Baba has placed all her children in careers and given them a roof above their heads. He continues to guide them through every aspect of life just like he would do for me and my brother. I will admit sometimes it makes me feel jealous. But when I look back, I haven't done half as much for him as they do. In that respect, 'Kite Runner'. will always be a very special book as I'm sure all of us would relate to it in some way.

Having said all and so much more left unsaid, Kolkata/Calcutta remains to have a special place in my heart. Its every nook and cranny has some sort of memory that has made me what I am today.

This post ends with Shomeek's eye of the city which I feel really captures the heart and soul of the City of Joy.

Spring is in the air

Okay, this is more of a disclaimer than a real post for people who are wondering whether I ever came back from my vacation. My two nephews, a 9 yr old and 5 yr old are spending their spring break with me this week. So, I hardly get time to be in front of a computer or do anything with 'me' time in it. And once they are gone I will take couple more weeks just to get back into the normal groove of things - so please bear with me. In the mean time we are all having lots of fun, enjoying the gorgeous outdoors and eating lots of yummy food.

Calcutta - here we come!

I am so excited to be going back home after two years. This will also be Evani's first trip there and she gets to celebrate her first birthday with family. We leave on Monday , Feb 11th and return March 2nd. I hope not to be blogging while I'm gone - but if I can't resist sharing pictures with you, I might log in. :)

Ciao!

And then there was LIGHT!

Or maybe it was 'aight'. I any case, officially it is Evani's first word...yoohooooo!!!

A peek into Evani's world

Below are a few clips of Evani that pretty much covers the major part of her daily activities.

Here is Evani trying to feed herself from the bottle right after I changed her diaper. Her expression when she loses grip of the bottle is classic and cracks me up each time I watch it.



It has always been Shomeek's dream that his daughter will be a soccer player (I have no idea why!) and it seems he doesn't want to waste any time in the process. So, when Shomeek spotted the soccer ball at Ikea, he had to pick it up. Soccer training has officially kicked off. Beware my dear friend Conor - you will be needed pretty soon. (Conor is a very good friend/ex-colleague who is also a soccer coach:). Btw, here is a little secret: Shomeek likes playing with the soccer ball more than Evani does.



Evani is drawn to the remote like a magnet. However much I try to put a variety of toys out for her, she will automatically get drawn to the remote on the couch and ignore the fact that we spend money to buy her toys and that she should be putting them to use.

Cheap Entertainment

It did involve a big screen and lots of unknown people, yet it had nothing to do with cable or internet. It was the monitor at SF international airport that allows you a viewing of the arriving passengers right before they actually get out into the arrivals lobby. The intention of that might be for you to get ready to receive, whoever you are there to receive, with a broad grin or something of that sort, but for us Pauls it was better than comedy night on NBC.

The best part is that most passengers do not know that they are being watched by herds of unknown people. So, their actions and emotions are absolutely genuine, and for some, pretty embarrassing if they ever found out that they were being displayed on a huge screen. I wonder if their friends or family ever let them in on the amusement.

We were there on Saturday to receive my mother-in-law, who was returning from her vacation in India. As usual her luggage was amongst the last to arrive and hence we had a pretty long wait out there. With Evani keeping herself entertained in her stroller, we resorted to observing strangers around us, especially on the screen. It was a Cathay Pacific flight that had just arrived from Hong Kong. It was intriguing to watch all the passengers. We started weaving stories on their lives based on how they were dressed for such a long flight, the luggage they carried, their facial expressions. It was fun to watch the first timers arriving in SFO trying real hard to suppress their excitement before coming out of the gates. There were the occasional nose pickers as well oblivious to the fact that they were on camera. The stilettos and freshly applied makeup of a few after the 14 or 15 hour flight put me to shame and reminded me how shabby I looked after the early morning (which is 8 am, btw) 2 hour drive from Sacramento.

The one who most caught our attention however was a guy who was at the receiving end. An Indian guy sporting a formal jacket over jeans - seemingly not an ABCD (American Born Confused Desi), who clutched a laptop with his dear life waiting for someone to arrive. The reason he had a laptop was the object of curiosity for us. He must have had a very reasonable cause for it but the fun lay in the conclusions we came up with:
1. His newly-wed wife must be arriving to the U.S. for the first time and he carried the laptop to impress her
2. He was a geeky software engineer who felt insecure without his laptop
3. He was meeting a client for business and had to start working immediately upon their arrival at the airport - nah! (this was ruled out by Shomeek)
After much discussion on him we named him 'laptop da' ('da' being colloquial for 'dada' which means 'elder brother' in Bengali) and was eager to catch a glimpse of the person who he was there for. However, amidst all the other strangers who were entertaining us, we missed that most important moment and he was gone. It reminded me of the power cuts that were bound to happen in the middle of our most favorite shows back home and so the mystery remains forever.

You writers can be on strike for as long as you want - we don't need you or your characters to keep us entertained!

Welcome '08

Happy New Year!

I know...I know...my first post in the new year has long been due. Initially I had thought that the holidays would be more of us just chilling out at home but eventually it ended up being pretty hectic. The highlight was our Tahoe trip. It was Evani's first snow experience and she seemed to enjoy every bit of it.

The holidays being over, I find myself back into the daily groove of things. 2007 was a very special year with the birth of Evani, Wacker Design Group and TranceFusion Dance Company. These all came with a huge responsibility as well. I just hope this year I am able to balance every aspect of my life.

2008 started off with Wacker Design moving into an office space in Roseville, thanks to some wonderful friends - YAY! We're not fully functional there yet, but that's not too far away.
TDC has been invited to perform on Jan 26th at a fundraiser for the cyclone victims of Bangladesh. We have also set ourselves in full gear for offering classes to adults and children.
I am continuing to knock on doors to find someone in India who can help Dr. Ernie Bodai introduce the Breast Cancer Stamp there. All efforts in this regard is seeming futile, but I will keep trying as long as I can.

On the home front, Evani has been growing rapidly. She is a burst of energy and is trying to take a few steps if you hold her. We will finally be making our trip to India with her mid Feb. Cleaning poopy diapers is just getting worse by the day due to the stench. I seem to smell poop everywhere. Shomeek's huge nose is finally coming in handy - he seems to identify that Evani has pooped from miles away. I continue to watch crappy movies that Shomeek gets from Blockbuster as that seems to be the only form of entertainment for us. We have been trying hard to control our urge to eat out, which results in the fact that I am having to cook regularly...uurrghhhh!!! From the onset of '08 I have been craving chocolate brownies with vanilla ice-cream. The craziest thing I did however was meet in person a friend I made online (I have not heard the end of this from my other friends). Thankfully he didn't turn out to be a criminal or a weirdo. In fact I am really glad I met him. He seems to be a wonderful and talented person and he has become a very good friend (okay, you know who you are, I deserve to be treated for saying such wonderful things about you on my blog:).

All in all, 2008 has started off pretty well. Lots of things to do and greater heights to be achieved. Thanks to all family and friends for being around and supporting me in every endeavor of mine. I hope to spend some more time with all of you this year.

Inspired

Tonight, after nearly a year, I went to the theater to watch a Hindi movie and I am really glad it was 'Tare Zameen Par'. Not only does it a have a solid storyline and a strong message, but it stood out to me artistically as well. The simplicity of its creation made it appealing to me. It was not over dramatic in trying to make you sob and feel very sorry for the characters. It is not my intent to review the movie or tell you the story, the reason I'm writing about it lies in the fact that I strongly related to it in various aspects to the minutest detail. When I was in boarding school we used to push the food with the fork (held in our left hand) into the spoon (held with our right) and shove it in out mouths. That is exactly how they showed it in the movie. You the reader might be thinking - so what's the big deal - and I wish I could explain. It felt like I knew exactly how the nine year old boy felt the day his parents waved him goodbye his first day at boarding school.

A very inspirational movie and a must see for especially the Indian parents. Gosh, I think I'm in love with Aamir Khan all over again. :)

Think India

India saw the advent of its first television commercial in the late 70's. At that time they were sparse as was the programming. As Doordarshan launched its mega soap opera's, 'Hum Log' and 'Buniyaad' in the 80's we saw an influx of advertisers such as Maggi Noodles, Vicco and Nirma whose sales actually boosted for their price quality positioning. It was not until the early nineties with the broadcast of satellite TV by foreign programmers like CNN followed by Star TV and a little later by domestic channels such as Zee TV and Sun TV that commercials took a front seat in the Indian homes. Companies jumped in to sell their product to this vast population absolutely hooked to their television sets. Advertising companies went all out to be creative and thus started the legend of brilliant television commercials that not only sold products; but told stories, made us laugh and cry and most importantly THINK.

Since then, Indian commercials have gotten better and bigger and has left its mark on the global advertising world. They have in fact become mini-movies which casts mega Bollywod actors and uses background scores compiled by renowned music directors. Overall, they are creative, fresh, soul stirring and an absolute treat to watch.

Here are some of my recent favorites.

White Space

For all of you who know the designer in me as the advocate of 'white space' - this redesign was bound to happen. :)

Hot Cross Buns

As my little darling snoozes on my chest, what better to do than play along with my fellow bloggers (ArSENik. to be precise ;)and disclose to everyone my taste in music. Now there goes my image!

Rules (as per 'I don't know who at this point'):
1. Put your MP3 player/Media player on shuffle
2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer.
3. You must write the name of the song no matter what.

IF SOMEONE SAYS “IS THIS OKAY?” YOU SAY?
Ocean Monsoon Night - Prem Joshua
I think this is time to reveal I have ADD.

WHAT WOULD BEST DESCRIBE YOUR PERSONALITY?
The language of Innocence - Bikram Ghosh
Me blushing & batting my eyelids :)

WHAT DO YOU LIKE IN A GUY/GIRL?
Jao Chere Chole - some Bangla band
No strings attached - what can I say.

HOW DO YOU FEEL TODAY?
Yaad hai - The Salman & Shilpa movie on Aids
That's exactly how I feel - yaad hai woh life before husband and baby.

WHAT IS YOUR LIFE’S PURPOSE?
Krishna - Colonial Cousins
I've been trying to tell my MIL that I am religious - no idea why she doesn't believe me.

WHAT IS YOUR MOTTO?
O Rey Chori - Lagaan
Hmmm...should I be coming out of the closet???

WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS THINK OF YOU?
Lalkaar - Rang de Basanti
Totally.

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR PARENTS?
Purani Jeans - Ali Haider
So purani that we still haven't been able to convince dad to use a computer.

WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT VERY OFTEN?
Masty Masty - Ali Zafar
Absolutely!

WHAT IS 2+2?
Woh Kagaz ki Kashti - Jagjit Singh
Mathematically challenged from birth, that ship has sailed since Madhyamik - never to return.

DO YOU THINK OF YOUR BEST FRIEND?
Khoya Khoya Chaand - Khoya khoya chaand
Currently she has switched from 'khoya khoya' phase to 'crying crying pacche' phase ever since she returned to Canada from vacationing in Kolkata.

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
Ban Ke Tera Jogi - Phir Bhi Dil Hain Hindustani
:)

WHAT IS YOUR LIFE STORY?
Amader Janya - Suman Chatturje
Darshonik!

WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GROW UP?
Sabse bara Rupaya - Bluffmaster
Ha..ha...I wish!

WHAT DO YOU THINK WHEN YOU SEE THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
Chand Chupa Badal Main - Hum Dil De Chuke Sanam


WHAT DO YOUR PARENTS THINK OF YOU?
Kuch Khushbuye - The Salman & Shilpa movie on Aids
I think they are referring to my dirty socks here.

WHAT WILL YOU DANCE TO AT YOUR WEDDING?
Love Theme - Hum Dil De Chuke Sanam
If it was my pick it would have been 'ami kolkata-r rosogolla'. I would still be happily single till date.

WHAT WILL THEY PLAY AT YOUR FUNERAL?
Rainforest - Vanraj Bhatia
Kinda like this one.

WHAT IS YOUR HOBBY/INTEREST?
Gaan Bhalobeshe Gaan - Chandrabindoo
Sa-Re-Ga-Ma

WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST SECRET?
Still Life - Prem Joshua
Even more darshonik...*dirghonishash!

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR FRIENDS?
Earthquake - Vanraj Bhatia
What can I say - I'm only friends with people who are addicted to food which helps them sustain their very 'healthy figures'.

WHAT SHOULD YOU POST THIS AS?
Hot Cross Buns - Baby Genius
Reflects the random nature of my current life.

In memorium

It is a bit eerie to some point that right after I write a post on the Indian Girl Child, we get a phone call on another relevant issue that has hit home. We are normally used to reading about social issues or watching them on the news and creating our own theories to discuss them in forums. We think we feel the pain and misery of the people involved in such incidents and try to sympathize or show our frustration towards this enlightened clan. It is however something else when such things happen to someone near and dear - it becomes REAL.

Last Friday, during our weekend calls to India, my husband found out that a very close cousin had been pronounced dead, after eleven days in a nursing home in Kolkata due to an overdose of sleeping pills. I had met her briefly on a few occasions during my wedding, from which I had deciphered her being a very successful, independent and confident individual with a very strong personality. Later I found out that she was indeed a favorite in my husband's family. Having lost her father at a very early age, she had taken over the family business and had run it successfully for several years since then. She single handedly traveled to various parts of the world making business deals at an age where we bunked college to catch the first day first show of Shahrukh Khan's new movie.

She wasn't labeled as the kind to have an arranged marriage. However, not having met her match, she was finally convinced by family to go ahead with it. The search began and a very suitable upper-middle class educated guy with a great job at hi-tech was found to tie the knot. It seemed to be the perfect social match, until after a few weeks of the wedding it was found that the guy had an illicit relation with his first cousin and the family had arranged his social marriage to keep that a secret from the community. Basically his marriage would act as a cover for him to continue his relation with his cousin. The groom and family also suggested to their bride to have an open marriage, where she would be free to have relations with other men as she chose.

The newly wed bride was distraught and her family immediately filed a criminal case against the groom and his family. As soon as the case was filed, the groom quit his cushy job and along with his family went absconding. For all of us who has any idea on the leagl system of India knows that any court case takes forever to get resolved. The humiliation is never ending and there is no guarantee on true justice being attained.

The result - a very young, beautiful, intelligent and sincere girl who having struggled all her life, finally gives up hope and commits suicide. She is taken to the hospital where her mother and sister prays every night in hope her child will come through. After seven days, of what I can imagine to the family as being 'hell', and having no will to fight for her dear life, her soul is finally put to rest on Friday, December 7th.

There are several such cases happening every year in India. The most common we hear about are Indian guys living overseas, ties the knot with a girl chosen by his family only to find out later that the guy is already married to someone in the country where he currently resides. Either the guys are too darned scared to let their parents know that he has already found someone who is not of his own caste or creed and agrees with this parents to get into matrimony to keep them appeased or the paretns do it knowingly to hide the fact that their son is (a) gay or (b) has married someone who is not a social match in their eyes. Either way, what I don't get is how can these people be so stupid to think they will be able to keep these second wives totally in the dark forever. And moreover, why would an educated person do something like this in the first place?

Over and over again, something like this happens and it crushes my hopes of seeing the developed India we so hope for. I continue to be drawn back to my motherland but I return just a bit more frustrated. I am often surrounded with guilt for not doing anything to rectify the situation, but I just don't know where to start.

The Girl Child

I woke up this morning very distressed due to a report I watched on BBC World last night on how U.K. Indian women were aborting girls. The Oxford University study suggests 1,500 girls are "missing" from the birth statistics in England and Wales from 1990 to 2005. One British woman, who spoke to the BBC anonymously, said she had an abortion after a doctor in India found she was to have a fourth daughter. Last time I checked, finding out the sex of a baby in India was illegal. Then how was this happening? BBC did an undercover filming on a renowned gynaecologist, Dr Mangala Telang - a doctor recommended by the British High Commission to find out that not only does she secretly perform the ultrasounds to reveal the sex of the unborn child but also provides recommendations to those couples who wish for an abortion after having found out they are having a girl.

There's some disturbing new evidence in India about a growing gender imbalance in the country that's home to more than a billion people. A report published jointly by the Indian government and the United Nations Population Fund shows an alarming drop in the number of baby girls. An estimated seven million girls have gone missing from India's population over the last 25 years. Some of them will have been killed after they were born, or allowed to die within their first few days. But most of them will have been aborted. Selective abortion is happening all over India as ultrasound machines - which carry out the scan - have become cheaper, but it has always been worst in Punjab and Gujarat.

It is even more disturbing to find out that it is the elite class of India that mostly indulge in such practices mainly because they have easy access to ultrasound machines and have the money to pay for such illegal practices.

Whenever, I make a trip back to India, I find my friends and family gloating about how rapidly India is developing on its way to becoming a super power in the very near future. When I ask them questions on this growth, I often find out that their theories are based on availability of hi-tech jobs that have sprung up in the past few years due to heavy outsourcing from the U.S., easy access to foreign merchandise, huge lifestyle change that imitates the ones seen on Hollywood/Bollywood movies and most recently the increasing value of the Rupee. No one talks about education, the discrimination, the corruption, the superstitions that till date tie our society down and worst of all no one does anything about it. How does such a society develop? How does such a country become a super power? How come we don't admit what it true and try to bring a change?

I am proud to be a mother of a girl.

9 months

I know its high time I posted an update on Evani. Its just that I sometimes find it hard to believe that it has already been nine months. Time has just whizzed past and I'm lucky enough to have savored it all.

Measuring at a little over 2 feet and weighing in close to 17 lbs (not quite there yet) she seems to be preparing herself well for America's Next Top Model. She even has the attitude for it (oh dear lord - save me!) and will let you know when she is not pleased with anything. There are time she needs undivided attention, but luckily for the most part she is happy keeping herself busy. The two bottom pearly whites have popped out and she loves to chew on whatever comes her way. Her recent favorites are mom's chicken stew, bread and bananas. She can eat bread any time of the day and does an awfully good job pecking at it on her own. She absolutely loves to be entertained by dad, but when it comes to anything else she needs her mom. She will clap for you when you say 'tai tai tai...mamar bari jai' and if you are lucky enough, you'll get a squeal along with it. Her very active lifestyle takes her all around the house these days, however she still quite hasn't figured out how to go into the sitting position from crawling. Her body mass being on the lower side - she is sometimes still unstable while sitting and will occasionally topple over and will then go into a confused state of whether she should cry or not. She loves books, not to read but chew on them instead. Her vocabulary consists of 'ooohhhh' (she's been saying this for the longest time), dada, mamma, and occasionally 'babba' along with various other sounds she manages to do with the clicking of her tongue. She loves to explore under the couch, yank at any wires that accidentally come within her reach and lick any kind of phone she manages to get her tiny hands on. In fact one day I found my cell phone dripping in saliva after which it refused to work for one whole day.

All in all, she is 24/7 entertainment for us and growing rapidly each day. I am glad I live in an age where I can share her progress with all of you via my blog, pictures and video. She is very lucky to have all of you as her well-wishers.

Zzzzzzz..........

This is a first - I sat to write something and totally lost my chain of thought. Its only 9:30pm and sleep is devouring me from every angle. I haven't been this sleep deprived or tired in a while.

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